I don't wanna talk about it - Rod Stewart
I've liked this song for a long time, and I gave it a shot.
| i dont wanna(talk ... |
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
Monday, March 19, 2007
Media, Cricket and Bollywood
Flipping through TV channels, I stumble upon a cricket show on a news channel called "Headlines Today". India are taking lunch after having scored 413 against a hapless Bermudian attack in an exhibition a friend of mine would call killing a dead snake.
On the sets are Sir Richard Hadlee(RH), Akshay Kumar(AK) and Katrina Kaif (KK) along with the host and some other guy who I cannot recognize (I'm guessing he is one of those Bollywood wannabees, has-beens, or would-bees, or a relative of a wannabe, hasbeen or wouldbe .... the latter is almost always true, isn't it?)
Now I'm not quite sure what Richard Hadlee is doing in India ... is he broke? Or is he being offered just so much money that he has to sit around and listen to Katrina Kaif complain when Akshay Kumar doesn't accept that she made so many runs while being the "batsperson" on the sets of 'Namaste London' (I don't know if I have the name right ... I don't care too much for the crap anyway, given my dereliction for Bollywood .... I know I know several people think that its the greatest, most wonderful, most intelligent film industry in the world but don't even get me started on what I think of it)
KK: "I'm so devastated that AK doesn't remember I was such a great batsperson while we were in London shooting for (some movie i don't know). I hit it really far"
RH: "How many runs did you make"
KK: "I couldn't run . ... i was wearing a costume .... my sister was running for me" (I guess I should watch out for her sisters' movie debut with bated breath... or does she need to date one of the Khan's for that too?)
Anyway I watch in mild surprise as Richard Hadlee (RH) tries to look interested ... while simultaneously being painfully aware of the ludicrousness that envelops him.....In the meanwhile, someone tells RH that AK is a black-belt.
RH: (trying to get in on the inanity) "maybe you should be my bodyguard"
AK: "If you can pay me as much as I make in Bollywood, I will be your bodyguard" (RH tries not to look insulted)
AK: "BTW I want to ask you a question .... Do you watch Bollywood movies"
RH: "I dont"
AK: "WHY?" (looking disgruntled ... maybe he doesn't know what plenty of Indians don't like Bollywood movies . ... and dont like most of the crap from Hollywood either)
By now, I'm sick to my stomach of the whole thing and I flip to something that more palatable.
Like I said, theres plenty wrong with the world to ensure that a person of Hadlee's accomplishments and stature is actually sharing a stage with someone who wears ketchup for a living and spends his time selling the same inane crap over and over again to an inane audience that can't seem to get enough of sheer stupidity and song and dance routines .... but every once in a while when you juxtapose quality with crap ... the effect is exquisitely terrible.
And finally, when will Pepsi ever learn that they are an American company and that trying to associate their brand with a notion of Indian patriotism that is based on the opportunism of overpaid, underachieving cricketers not to mention nonsensical advertising simply is like trying to climb Everest with noodles for rope!
Dont their execs watch Bangladesh tear our "tigers" apart? "Ladega to jeetega" ... yeah, right!
Pepsi embodies all that is synonymous with the average collective intelligence of Bollywood - their ads say .... India is playing world cup - if we are patriotic, we should cheer our team win - else u are not patriotic..... and if u are patriotic and are cheering India, you must love Sachin and his friends and you must love Pepsi, right? ...................Nice try!
Pepsi, when will you ever learn ...just shut up and tell the country u are selling sweet fizz and thats it. I may even buy a can if you did.
AK, you are better of keeping ur mouth shut until you have to make some inane comments in the recording studio ... if it helps tie that blackbelt around your mouth to secure it.
KK, please try dating someone who knows a few more producers directors and has a slightly cleaner image
And finally, Richard Hadlee...... you've been a real life hero, a world record holder and a credit to your profession .... dont throw all that away for some money and insurance benefits.
To cap all of this ... let us spare a thought for Bob Woolmer ... a hardworking, honest man who met a sad end in circumstances (cricketing and non-cricketing) that he had very little control over .... maybe we are all climbing Everest (or Kilimanjaro, if you prefer) with noodles for ropes .... we may just not know it.
Adios .... see you soon. And look on the bright side... its the best you can do :-)
Flipping through TV channels, I stumble upon a cricket show on a news channel called "Headlines Today". India are taking lunch after having scored 413 against a hapless Bermudian attack in an exhibition a friend of mine would call killing a dead snake.
On the sets are Sir Richard Hadlee(RH), Akshay Kumar(AK) and Katrina Kaif (KK) along with the host and some other guy who I cannot recognize (I'm guessing he is one of those Bollywood wannabees, has-beens, or would-bees, or a relative of a wannabe, hasbeen or wouldbe .... the latter is almost always true, isn't it?)
Now I'm not quite sure what Richard Hadlee is doing in India ... is he broke? Or is he being offered just so much money that he has to sit around and listen to Katrina Kaif complain when Akshay Kumar doesn't accept that she made so many runs while being the "batsperson" on the sets of 'Namaste London' (I don't know if I have the name right ... I don't care too much for the crap anyway, given my dereliction for Bollywood .... I know I know several people think that its the greatest, most wonderful, most intelligent film industry in the world but don't even get me started on what I think of it)
KK: "I'm so devastated that AK doesn't remember I was such a great batsperson while we were in London shooting for (some movie i don't know). I hit it really far"
RH: "How many runs did you make"
KK: "I couldn't run . ... i was wearing a costume .... my sister was running for me" (I guess I should watch out for her sisters' movie debut with bated breath... or does she need to date one of the Khan's for that too?)
Anyway I watch in mild surprise as Richard Hadlee (RH) tries to look interested ... while simultaneously being painfully aware of the ludicrousness that envelops him.....In the meanwhile, someone tells RH that AK is a black-belt.
RH: (trying to get in on the inanity) "maybe you should be my bodyguard"
AK: "If you can pay me as much as I make in Bollywood, I will be your bodyguard" (RH tries not to look insulted)
AK: "BTW I want to ask you a question .... Do you watch Bollywood movies"
RH: "I dont"
AK: "WHY?" (looking disgruntled ... maybe he doesn't know what plenty of Indians don't like Bollywood movies . ... and dont like most of the crap from Hollywood either)
By now, I'm sick to my stomach of the whole thing and I flip to something that more palatable.
Like I said, theres plenty wrong with the world to ensure that a person of Hadlee's accomplishments and stature is actually sharing a stage with someone who wears ketchup for a living and spends his time selling the same inane crap over and over again to an inane audience that can't seem to get enough of sheer stupidity and song and dance routines .... but every once in a while when you juxtapose quality with crap ... the effect is exquisitely terrible.
And finally, when will Pepsi ever learn that they are an American company and that trying to associate their brand with a notion of Indian patriotism that is based on the opportunism of overpaid, underachieving cricketers not to mention nonsensical advertising simply is like trying to climb Everest with noodles for rope!
Dont their execs watch Bangladesh tear our "tigers" apart? "Ladega to jeetega" ... yeah, right!
Pepsi embodies all that is synonymous with the average collective intelligence of Bollywood - their ads say .... India is playing world cup - if we are patriotic, we should cheer our team win - else u are not patriotic..... and if u are patriotic and are cheering India, you must love Sachin and his friends and you must love Pepsi, right? ...................Nice try!
Pepsi, when will you ever learn ...just shut up and tell the country u are selling sweet fizz and thats it. I may even buy a can if you did.
AK, you are better of keeping ur mouth shut until you have to make some inane comments in the recording studio ... if it helps tie that blackbelt around your mouth to secure it.
KK, please try dating someone who knows a few more producers directors and has a slightly cleaner image
And finally, Richard Hadlee...... you've been a real life hero, a world record holder and a credit to your profession .... dont throw all that away for some money and insurance benefits.
To cap all of this ... let us spare a thought for Bob Woolmer ... a hardworking, honest man who met a sad end in circumstances (cricketing and non-cricketing) that he had very little control over .... maybe we are all climbing Everest (or Kilimanjaro, if you prefer) with noodles for ropes .... we may just not know it.
Adios .... see you soon. And look on the bright side... its the best you can do :-)
Thursday, March 15, 2007
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
What if
I wondered what it would feel like to beat the odds and the demons inside my own head.
I wondered what it would feel like if I walked into bat in the late stages of a match with the team in trouble against a good opposition and won the game off my bat.
I wondered what it would feel like to finish off such a game with a six ... of course a man of the match award would follow.
When all of this happened on 4 March 2007 in a must-win game for my team ... I only felt shock and disbelief.
Thats life, I guess ... seldom what you expect, even when it is what you imagined.
I wondered what it would feel like to beat the odds and the demons inside my own head.
I wondered what it would feel like if I walked into bat in the late stages of a match with the team in trouble against a good opposition and won the game off my bat.
I wondered what it would feel like to finish off such a game with a six ... of course a man of the match award would follow.
When all of this happened on 4 March 2007 in a must-win game for my team ... I only felt shock and disbelief.
Thats life, I guess ... seldom what you expect, even when it is what you imagined.
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